He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
