Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...