so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
