I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
