just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
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