my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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