Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
