Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
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