tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
23 Gruesome Scientific Facts That Will Make You Squirm
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences In Dating Men And Women
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle