Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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