if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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