he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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