If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
