I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I said "one day" and that day is not today
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
