You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I would ride that face into the sunset
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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