every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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