I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
