similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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