sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I just found puke in my bra..
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Found the puke drawer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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