He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Randomize
