At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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