So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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