stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
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He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
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Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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