i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
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