so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I think I sprained my soul last night
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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