I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
it's great music for shaving your balls
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
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