I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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