I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I wish I could teleport
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize