either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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