On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
