That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I made him laugh his dick is mine
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Randomize
