"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
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