so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Randomize
