dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
