i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
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