I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
