i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Randomize
