He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize