i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
