Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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