ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
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