You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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