Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize