no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
