Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank