What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
