STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
True strength comes from lack of pants
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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