I seem to have left my pride at pride
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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