I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize