maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
