I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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