If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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